Welcome one and all, this is A Newbies Blog does the Tour de France in Peloton sized blogs. Yes, sitting here in sunny Newy in glorious New South Wales, Australia where we have officially moved into Spring. I will try to keep my updates short and sweet, they will have a scattering of Come On URs as they start the season and I will try not to mention the breathtaking scenery, ask how they got all the building materials up those fecking mountains to build churches or how good the helicopter pilots. So let’s crack on.
Stage 4 – Sisteron to Orcières-Merlette
It’s the Alpine stage and not a rain cloud in sight, but this is the moment of truth for the contenders for the overall Yellow jersey. 160.5ks of breathtaking scenery, a cruel hilltop finish, an average incline of a mild 6.7%, with the final kilometre at 7.1% into Orcieres-Merlette. The race favourite Primož Roglič for team Jumbo–Visma won the stage, but he couldn’t shake off his rivals, so the overall stakes are hotting up people. France is still in the driving seat with Julian Alaphilippe of Deceuninck – Quick-Step keeping the Yellow jersey.
In the final descent before the riders got stuck into the hilltop finish Tiesj Benoot of Team Sunweb placed second in the breakaway miss judged a turn, slide along the metal road barrier before toppling over. Well, he got back up picked up his bike, the saddle fell off, grabs another one from the support car and carries on – legend!
Stage Winner: Primož Roglič of JUMBO – VISMA
Yellow Jersey: Julian Alaphilippe of DECEUNINCK – QUICK – STEP
Points: Peter Sagan of BORA – HANSGROHE
Climber: Benoit Cosnerfroy of AG2R LA MONDIALE
Team: EF PRO CYCLING
Stage 5 – Gap to Privas
No rain just 183ks of flat road meandering through the countryside, a chance for the riders to slow down and earn some points whenever the opportunity presents itself. On a day when the commentators discuss the fact that 80% of truffles and garlic come from around here tells you the type of ride we had in store. It was Wout van Aert of team Jumbo-Visma that edged a tight bunch sprint on a narrow winding finish to win the stage. Wait though my global audience there was trouble at Mill which upset the French – what’s wrong with that I hear you cry WELL Julian Alaphilippe was given a 20 second penalty for taking a water bottle from his support car at the wrong time meaning Britain’s Adam Yates of the Mitchelton-Scott team was given the Yellow jersey.
Respect is due to the Dutchman Wout Poels of UCI World Team Bahrain–McLaren who has been riding with a broken rib and injured lung since the opening stage, all this without any drugs – legend!
Stage Winner: Wout van Aert of JUMBO – VISMA
Yellow Jersey: Adam Yates of MITCHELTON – SCOTT
Points: Sam Bennett of DECEUNINCK – QUICK – STEP
Climber: Benoit Cosnerfroy of AG2R LA MONDIALE
Team: MITCHELTON – SCOTT
Stage 6 – Le Teil to Mont Aigoual
Not a rain cloud in sight which was useful for keeping upright with 191ks of open road ahead of you with a couple of speed bumps it was plain sail (or riding) for the first 155ks then it happened. Yes, another hilltop finish but I would question the term hilltop as it’s a freaking mountain if your asking. So it was Alexey Lutsenko of team Astana who raced away to a billy no mates finish to win the stage. Look at the map, two mountains with the last one at 11 bloody % now that is what I call a finish – well done fella.
Saw one crash when some bloke decided to do a swan drive for fun as nothing was around him but he got up and carried on. The man from Blighty Adam Yates still has the Yellow jersey despite the Frenchman having a burst of speed at the end, made some ground but not good enough. Oh no one made the schoolboy error of getting water bottle after the 20k mark, but I saw one rider do at 21ks
By the way, I will update you all on the Tour after the weekend as the Minister for War and Finance will throw a wobbler but here is the overall standings:
Stage Winner: Alexey Lutsenko of ASTANA PRO TEAM
Yellow: Adam Yates of MITCHELTON – SCOTT
Green: Sam Bennett of DECEUNINCK – QUICK – STEP
Polka-Dot: Benoit Cosnerfroy of AG2R LA MONDIALE
Team: EF PRO CYCLING
Stage 9 – Pau to Laruns
Stages 7&8 recapp – feckin big mountain, scattered with long flat sections.
With a slight drizzle overnight the race began without any swan dives – if you didn’t know what a drizzle is, it is generally less then 0.5mm of water usually produced by low stratiform and stratocumulus clouds. Anyway, the mountains are here as the race enters inclines of about 11 feckin %, and my global audience, welcome to the Pyrenees. This is where the fun begins. The riders have a rest day following this stage, so the Pyrenean ibex was on display as a warm-up for Stage 12. Anyway, it was the rookie Tadej Pogačar who won the Pyrenean mountain slog where the final clime was 12%.
Now the only bit of goss I could get was that all riders would be tested tomorrow and if #F*ckCovid-19 is found, then there will be a discussion about continuing the race. What I can glean is that the riders are sticking to the rule, but the spectators are not so much, now it’s not everyone just a small amount but come on people get with the program.
Stage Winner: Tadej Pogačar of UAE TEAM EMIRATES
Yellow: Primož Roglič of JUMBO – VISMA
Green: Peter Sagan of BORA – HANSGROHE
Polka-Dot: Benoit Cosnerfroy of AG2R LA MONDIALE
Team: MOVISTAR
Stage 10 – Île d’Oléron Le Château-d’Oléron to Île de Ré Saint-Martin-de-Ré
The sun was out, and the road flat but technically bloody difficult, with narrow streets, road furniture everywhere and a crosswind coming off the Atlantic Stage 10 had it all. They say the luck of the Irish, but Sam Bennett first win on his debut Tour was exceptional – Well done fella!
An emotional Sam Bennett for Deceuninck–Quick-Step gets the win with Primož Roglič of Jumbo – Visma keeps hold of the Yellow Jersey. I can recall about three crashes due to the changing road conditions and road furniture jumping out on riders. One thing I do agree on the commentator is when there is a crash early on in the race, the Peloton should ease up a little to allow fallen riders to reform. But when there is blood in the water the Great White look to take advantage (Aussie reference to one of its alpha predators) as they say all’s fair in Love and War. Here are the standings
Stage Winner: Sam Bennett of DECEUNINCK – QUICK – STEP
Yellow: Primož Roglič of JUMBO – VISMA
Green: Matteo Trentin of CCC
Polka-Dot: It was flat or undulating at best!
Team: TREK – SEGAFREDO
Stage 11 – Châtelaillon-Plage to Poitiers
Much the same as yesterday, the sun shone, the road ahead was flat which was good for the sprinters and for the skippies! It was the Aussie rider Caleb Ewan that won the stage with a late burst of speed to pass the Irishman and mate, Sam Bennett – roll it back a little there Craig, Stage 11 sounds a lot like Stage 3 but without the elbows.
Well that was the end of the flat section as tomorrow there will be no hills but feckin’ mountains. Good days riding done by all as they passed through a region famous for its butter and oysters. Salt-water bivalve molluscs are not my thing, but the butter is under licence and graces the breakfast tables of Buckingham Palace no less.
On the subject of food, the Minister for War & Finance always accuses me of sticking my elbows out whilst cooking so that she can not see what I am creating. Peter Sagan did the ream thing, some reported it as a headbutt, but it was all elbows in my humble opinion – so he will be starting at the back of the Peloton and deducted points for dangerous sprinting.
Stage Winner: Caleb Ewan of LOTTO SOUDAL
Yellow: Primož Roglič of JUMBO – VISMA
Green: Matthieu Ladagnous of GROUPAMA – FDJ
Polka-Dot: Matthieu Ladagnous of GROUPAMA – FDJ
Team: MITCHELTON – SCOTT
Stage 12 – Chauvigny to Sarran Corrèze
The MOUNTAINS are coming!! Bit of a slog today as the Tour heads for the hills but the old saying always the Bridesmaid never the Bride wasn’t to be. Marc Hirschi of Sunweb timed his break away with 25ks to go to clinch victory holding off late bursts – so well-done fella!
Now the pantomime villain from yesterday was looking to gain some ground especially starting at the back but as with all Disney classics good prevails and he fell short. On another note one bloke dropped out with cracked ribs during the warm up ride a few days earlier playing silly buggers – lesson to all you riders right there!.
The sprinters stayed in the Peloton and I finally found out what Poursuivant means pursuer – should of Googled it earlier but I kept spelling it wrong. Here are the standing
Stage Winner: Marc Hirschi of TEAM SUNWEB
Yellow: Primož Roglič of JUMBO – VISMA
Green: Nils Politt of ISRAEL START-UP NATION
Polka-Dot: Mathieu Burgaudea of TOTAL DIRECT ENERGIE
Team: TEAM SUNWEB
Stage 15 – Lyon to Grand Colombier
Stages 13&14 recap: Flat with small hills – yeah right!
Before I start, I would like to say that I worked quite a bit in Clermont-Ferrand about thirty years age and the fresh mountain air is breath taking, literally and its twin town is Aberdeen. Funniest thing, I saw a square roundabout, or should I say squareabout which threw a couple of riders but no one took a swan dive.
Back to Stage 15 and all I can say is did you see the incline on that feckin mountain in the last 20k, that’s downright cruel but enjoyable to watch though you must admit. What was Adam Yates doing flexing his muscles too soon and team Jumbo – Visma must be pretty pissed with coming second especially leading the pack for so long. With Tadej Pogacar of UAE Team Emirate finishing on top of the Grand Colombier mountain, Primoz Roglic retained the overall Yellow jersey and the sprinters found it tuff (mountains aren’t their thing!) Rest day tomorrow so here are the standings:
Stage Winner: Tadej Pogacar of UAE TEAM EMIRATES
Yellow: Primož Roglič of JUMBO – VISMA
Green: Matteo Trentin of CCC
Polka-Dot: Jesus Herrada of COFIDIS
Team: TEAM JUMBO – VISMA
Stage 16 – La Tour-du-Pin to Villard-de-Lans
Nothing like starting the day with all the categories in terms of inclines covered – I believe that the collective noun for mountains is a range and this range will be bloody knackering.
Anyway, Lennard Kämna of Bora won the stage by making a dash for the line after 20ks but as they say fortune favours the brave. Primož Roglič keeps the overall Yellow jersey but what a day for riding. Climbs, ascents, more climbs, more ascents but where there a mountains you usually find valleys, and I take my hat off to the helicopter TV crew who flew through a breathtaking valley to film the race – bloody impressive!
Now talking historically, Anglo-French relations have been somewhat strained throughout the years, but I will say France is a beautiful country and if I were going to ride a gruelling bike race I would do it in France – Tour of Britain just does have the same gravitas. Here are the standings
Stage Winner: Lennard Kämna of BORA – HANSGROHE
Yellow: Primož Roglič of JUMBO – VISMA
Green: Matteo Trentin of CCC
Polka-Dot: Nans Peters of AG2R LA MONDIALE
Team: INEOS GRENADIERS
Stage 17 – Grenoble to Méribel Col de la Loze
The Alps – enough said!
There is a lot of benefit from actually living at 2500m above sea level as the Colombian Miguel Ängel López knows too well as he won the Queens stage, with Primož Roglič keeping the overall Yellow jersey.
2304m above bloody sea level people in some places it was 25%, putting that into perspective it’s like putting a plank of wood up your household stairs then cycling up it – but for a couple of ks!. Which crazy Frenchman came up with that. The Col de La Loze, which is the mountain in question here, has been included in the Tour for 59 years. Can you imagine trying to get up that bloody thing on a bike which wasn’t made of carbon fibre but old scaffold tubes. The Queens Stage, go save the King if you are asking, what a bloody challenge but for me its cycling cruelty of the highest order but great to watch, anyway here are the standings
Stage Winner: Lennard Kämna of BORA – HANSGROHE
Yellow: Primož Roglič of JUMBO – VISMA
Green: Julian Alaphilippe of DECEUNINCK – QUICK – STEP
Polka-Dot: Richard Carapaz of INEOS GRENADIERS
Team: JUMBO – VISMA
Stage 18 – Méribel to La Roche-sur-Foron
As if cycling vertically for a day wasn’t enough – more Alps!
The Alpine ibex also known as the steinbeck, bouquetin or just simply ibex could not be seen for love nor money during this stage as its too high. As I said yesterday which crazy Frenchman came up with this route – bloody great to watch but sod off if you want to ride it. Michal Kwiatkowski won the stage alongside his teammate for Ineos Grenadiers with Primož Roglič retaining the overall Yellow jersey but a big shout out to Richard Carapaz for King of the Mountain.
Admit it you didn’t watch this stage for the flats but to watch rides struggle going up and hanging on for grim death going down. My highlights were of course the mountains but I take my hat off to Marc Hirschi with his burst of speed in the closing section the climb and for putting in a dam fine effort to catch the climbers after taking a swan dive going downhill at speed – well played fella! Oh cannot forget to mention the Skippie Richie Porte who got a front tyre puncture on the gravel section, rode through it, changed bikes and still retain his 4th place overall – outstanding! anyway here are the standings
Stage Winner: Michal Kwiatkowski of INEOS GRENADIERS
Yellow: Primož Roglič of JUMBO – VISMA
Green: Sam Bennett of DECEUNINCK – QUICK – STEP
Polka-Dot: Marc Hirschi of TEAM SUNWEB
Team: JUMBO – VISMA
Badger & Batbottom 